Wanna read some fantasies and fan-fiction….you’re at the right place.
Smelly Cat, Smelly cat what are they feeding you?
Smelly Cat, smelly cat it’s not your fault…
They won’t take you to the vet.
You’re obviously not their favorite pet.
You may not be a bed of roses,
And you’re no friend to those with noses.
I promise you before we’re done,
All the world will smell ohhhh,
Smelly cat, smelly cat what are they feeding you?
Smelly cat, smelly cat it’s not your fault!
~Phoebe Buffay on F.R.I.E.N.D.S.
Why is it that these days, everyone is a self-appointed guru/guide/leader/philosopher or rather aptly a-person-who-has-mastered-life? Why do they just assume that I have absolutely no control over my life and they, the God-appointed people consider it as their duty to enlighten my path to righteousness? Moreover, the majority of these preachers have themselves failed to achieve the so-called-success in their lives. But, unfortunately this does not stop them from rattling of with suggestions the next time I meet them.
I do agree that everyone needs a motivating factor in the gloomy journey of life. A know-it-all person who can give us the ultimate formula for a happy life. But in my opinion, can anyone but YOU decide what is best for YOU? Can someone be a better judge of your life than YOU, yourself? Is happiness a milestone in one’s life? Or is it a momentary state of mind whose beauty lies in its fleeting nature? There is no magic mantra, no formula, no divine procedure as to ‘attain’ happiness. Also, let’s reflect on the popular belief: Success and Happiness go hand in hand. Is it so? Look around you, don’t just look, observe the people around you. Isn’t everyone still in the pursuit of happiness? And I say pursuit, because it’s a journey without a definite destination. There are no guarantees, no safety-hacks, no surety at all in the gamble called Life.
And thus, I reiterate my thinking, no one has the right to preach ‘happiness’ or ‘success’ onto others. He who tries and fails is not a Lost Traveller but an Explorer. So, my blunt request: STOP. Let me explore, let me experience, let me fail and then watch me gain.
In all probability, you may not agree with me? But that’s okay. Maybe you are right. Because what do I know, I’m just a mortal in pursuit of happiness.
With the onset of a new season, hope and cheer fill our bodies with optimistic vibes and one more thing, a delectable platter of assorted germs and bacteria. This article goes out to the ones with weak-immunity systems who catch a cold even if there is an iota of change in the weather. Universal Truth:Everyone gets sick once in a while and there is no denying that. So here I’m going to briefly outline the different reactions various people have towards catching a cold.
THE DRAMATIC ONE:
(Shouts while running around the house, with a filthy tissue which needs to be replaced)
I’M SICK! I’M SICK! Someone please notice that I’m unwell. This (rather harmless) cold is killing me. It seems as the insides of my throat are made of sandpaper. I can’t walk or talk or BREATE!
THE WORKAHOLIC ONE:
( Ignores to identify the existence of some disturbance in his body)
I don’t have time to be sick. I have to complete this report by midnight or I’m definitely fired. I can’t cut myself any slack, not when I’m trying to get that life-changing-promotion. Maybe after I get the promotion, I’ll have time to be sick. But, not now. Back to work!
THE OVERTHINKER:
(Types ferociously at the keyboard, clicking at every result Google comes up with.)
I really don’t think this is the flu. Why? Because I am showing all the symptoms of the bird flu, an aneurysm in my brain H1N1 flu and even small pox. Wasn’t small pox eradicated by the efforts of W.H.O.? I think I may the rare, one-in-a-bajillion case. But, wait a second according to this new search result, I undoubtedly have some or the other form of cancer! Let me get a head start and search for some hospitals with good oncology departments.
THE ‘soi-disant’ DOCTOR:
(Going through the previous prescriptions and being a miser)
I think I can pop the Cetrizine and half of a Zady tablet along with this Chinese looking cough syrup before going to bed and follow up in the morning with two tablets of Allegra. I sure I’ll be fit as a fiddle in a couple of days. Who needs doctors now when we have Google? And who wants to waste money paying the outrageously high doctor’s fee?
THE INTROVERT:
(Speaking from under the blanket which protects him from all unnecessary eye-contact)
What mom!? I can’t go for a family wedding when I’m this sick. ( Gets a handkerchief and blows into in with the power of Eurus in order to convince mom.) I’ll get everyone there sick too. Please let me stay in my comfortable and cozy (and full of germs) bed.
THE EMOTIONAL BLACKMAILER:
(Ensuring that every member of the house does not have a life.)
Could you please pass me my pills. (which are lying incredibly close to my hand) I would have taken them myself, but I’ve got a terrible body ache that is devouring me from inside-out. I’m sorry that I’m sick. I feel like I’m a burden to you. Wait! You can’t​ leave me all alone sick at home even if Uncle Sam is having a heart attack. What if I faint? Or I need to be hospitalized!?
THE IATROPHOBIC:
(Hiding in a dark corner)
Do you even know the kind of instruments doctors have at their clinic? And they use them at their own discretion and no one objects? What if the diagnosis the doctor gives is wrong? He could even inject me with syringe needles the size of Rapunzel’s hair! I’ll get better by the evening. I’m sure I don’t need to visit the doctor.
I hope I’ve covered the basic ones. The rest are just a concoction of these, which places them in a-slightly-more-difficult-to-handle lot. Have you found your reflection? Comment below! And Happy Germs!
