Why absolutely no one WINs during WINters

Reasons why I hate winters. I urge winters to revert back with an email explaining this behaviour.

1. Every time I try taking of my pants/denims, my socks (which I don’t want to take off) also come off. Inverted. So, then I have to make the extra effort of turning the sock back in the right state and re-socking my feet. Till then, my wee little toes have to face the cold.
2. Every time I burrow in my blanket with the laptop on top and my stubby fingers have the coldest knuckles which makes typing very hard. After a point, the only range of movement left in my cold knuckles is about 14°, which isn’t much. To be fair, I have to admit, the range of motion wasn’t great to begin with. If I owe someone any typed content and you haven’t received it yet, now you know the reason.
3. Winters mess up my hair washing schedule. Enough said.
4. The absolute frustration of putting on layers of clothes every time followed by one sleeve getting stuck midway. I hate it. It takes exponentially longer to get ready in winters.
5. Making chai takes 50X longer in the winters and people consume chai 50X more often during winters. The milk just ignores the quivering stove flame underneath it. Freaking stubborn cold-hearted milk. (Does this qualify as a pun?)
6. The tiniest little injury/bruise seems massive in the winters. Last week I had a miniscule splinter in my thumb and I can still feel the pain. I would have easily ignored it during the summers.
7. The dhoop sekne wala timeframe does not match my class schedule. Main kab seku dhoop? And on days I don’t have my classes, there is no dhoop. Nainsaafi ki heights.
8. All the extra seasonal vegetables that my mother gets a chance to kneed into the aata itself. So, my plate can look like a Pollock (look at me being all fancy, making art references) featuring aloo bathue ki sabzi, bathue ka raita and bathue wali roti. Just kidding, this isn’t true. It will be if you replace the aloo bathue ki sabzi with aloo methi 🙂
9. I don’t like it when my sister uses me as a personal heater when she is cold and then throws me out of the blanket once she is warm enough.
10. Nahi hai koi 10th point. Akad gayi unglian itna type karte karte iss jaade mein.

What even is this blog? A recycled meme storehouse? A storage container for weak puns? Baasi content? Ho kya raha hai idhar?!